Wit and Wisdom A La Cordi

Okay so its short on wisdom and probably wit too...but I needed a different title than "ramblings" again.
Here collectively are questions, thoughts and random moments of clarity.

I need more hours in the day.

I need less hours in the day.

Do not bathe if you are shaving your hairy legs, armpits and nether region, shower instead or you will never ever rinse all the tiny hairs off, and then whats the point....

Learn to listen to your children before its too late....get over the nodding the head Uh-huh thing before you have to make an emergancy run to the vet to remove a q-tip from the dogs butt because you did the nodding head uh-huh thing when asked if they can poo it out and can I try and see?.....

Never kiss your mate so passionately at the front door that a good-bye kiss turns to a hearty grunting hump session at the front door and then try to explain to your kid, who comes to see what the noise is, that Mom and Dad always do exercises before Daddy goes to work and aint it cool how Mom can grab her ankles?....

Never play Neopets for 8 hours straight or you'll end up petting the monitor screen and cooing to your virtual pet.

Never say the L word unless you mean it, never say the h word unless you mean it.

Notice how the L word is soft on your mouth? It sorta rolls off your tongue. And the H word is harsh and the t sound really sticks in the roof of your mouth.

The older I get the more I like me and the less I like most humans....

How come I debate buying garbage bags because the cost X amount per bag but have no problem dropping bucks on yarn, coffee, or DVDs?

How come when no one is around I shimmy like Shakira and sing at the top of my lungs? How come I dont stop if someone walks in on me?

I love the way the sugary crud in sugar waffers melts on my tongue.

I love the smell of fresh baked bread....such a content feeling.

And last but not least...and probably the most serious:

Preservation of ones spirit is more important than the right of someone else to express their thoughts.

Cordelia Yeomans 2005

Flasher......

This is for Kimberly....my obligitory "money shot"...HA

Honestly though, I haven't a clue if this is sad or something to be proud of. And even more sad is, I have falling yarn swap yarn coming, more eBay goodies from Rodney and some other chick....AND I still have a rubbermaid tub and rubbermaid four drawer bin full of thread and other yarns. SIGH! Hey, at least it aint crack or mad dog.

Wasting Time

Well here at sit at the PC....doing nothing. Yea well okay I guess Im making a blog entry...

I have tons to do....yule boxes, plus the guessing game gifts, plus cleaning my craft room, plus etc and further more and yada yada....

Sigh....but my booty refuses to get in motion....I'm a slug....I think I must be getting ready for my next life...I will indeed be a slug....Crap I hope some twerp of a frenchman dont eat me....oh that was gross on so many levels...Anywho....

I used my bag that Lynlee made and sent me....I must say it took a beating...poor thing....I had two PBs in there as well as my portable cd player, wallet, a ball of unopened #10 thread, my hook case, and a pattern booklet....HUZZAH....it so rocks!

So I need opinions....again I'm probably over thinking..BUT here's the deal-i-o...
I have some buddies I want to send gift-age too....BUT honestly I dont know what type of doo-dads they'd like. So I was thinking I would send an email to the blessed few...LMAO, just kidding....and in the e-mail I would ask silly things like fave color, you wear shawls? Ponchos? Scarves?....scent faves etc...you get the crux, a'ight! So you think thats something that can be done without making someone feel on the spot...and does it reek of "I dont know you very well"....Worry one they may think they are obligated to send me something, which is the very very very last thing I want to happen. Worry two what if they have mentioned these things before and I have forgotten, geez then I come off as not really reading or listening to them. Well none-the-less tell me what you think, please.

Currents:
Reading: Shadows by John Saul and something by Voltier

Listening to: Petra Berger, yea its opera so what

Working on: Long sleeve shrug, scarves, bolero from HELL, scrunchies, and purse

Swaps: Falling yarn, purse, scrunchy

Excited about: The November round of Holiday gifting, and e-mails for peeps. I was tickled to get a chatty e-mail from Lynlee....Does she not rock!? I likes me some chatty e-mails even though I dont really know how to be chatty back.

Waiting on in the mail: Bernat disco yarn, latest eBay purchases, falling yarn goodies, purse for swap, and anything but bills, and sale ads YUCK!

And where the hell is our boob button....I am so down with joining a web ring for REAL women who arent afraid to be real....cellulite, whiskers, tilted boobage, saggy ass, whatevah!

Be watching for a new poll.....Im thinking its about time, after Yule to start that book blog....YAY!

H stands for........

HOLY HELL..... that lady is driving with her knees and putting make up on with one hand and talking on the cell with the other....

and for.....

Holy &83^^&*%79..... that man is doing WHAT at the red light!???

Yep we are indeed on our way back to H town tomorrow.....

Good thoughts people..... you don't want to see me on the evening national news do you?

Priscilla, I closed the page out as I saw your question go up.....I apologize! My rudeness was not intended....Sometimes being rude is called for , but this wasn't one of those times!

I hope we are back tomorrow night, or tonight rather as its 12:30 am, CRAP.

Revelations

Observations, sighs, plain old WTFs.....try and keep up plz, granted it will be scattered, but fellow lunatics may be able to roll with it.

Today I type a response in C'ville as: " I'm guessing reading comprehension wasn't big in your school district"....only to erase it and be less crass.

Have you ever noticed people that go on about how unselfish they are and that they give and never expect anything back......(I'm not talking a tiny remark, I'm talking almost every sentence outta their mouth) really are big giant whiners and wanna be martyrs? These same people feel the need to point out your faults and uses themselves as an example of how I should feel!

Being out of shape sucks....Yoga has been replaced by ambling to the pc.

I want lime jello...and forget to purchase it at the grocer every week, for months now.

One boob is smaller than the other and I found a hair on my friggin chin.

I only have one real life in person friend other then The Old Man and The Offspring. And I dont even find this sad...I'm sorta grateful I dont know more people in person.

I'm more judgemental than I allow myself to believe I am.

Why do people make post with font so big you can't read one complete sentence without having to scroll thru the whole damned page! Gives me a friggin headache.

How can the typed word of some make my stomach roll? Each time they post it ooozes bitchiness. Or know it alledness! YUCK!

How can you feel a kinship with someone you never met?

Notice the very people that say they won't read your blog due to a eff word on occassion don't even flinch when they watch soaps and other crap full of "immoral" behavior.....gotta keep that spirit pure now don't we?

My Yule list is larger this year than previous years.....

Charity isn't buying a friggin candy bar from you local little league chapter!

I am dying for RENT to come out in November...I've been singing that damned song for two weeks now......"525,600 minutes, 525,000 moments so dear. 525,600 minutes - how do you measure,
measure a year? In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee. In
inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife. In 525,600 minutes - how do you
measure a year in the life?
How about love? How about love? How about love? Measure in love. Seasons of
love."

My daughter is taller than me.

I was tickled watching Deneen, Lynlee and Priscilla trying to figure out what I did for a living...LOL Shall you stew some more? LOL
Okay the answer is................I was indeed a Chef! Very interesting story that I will get to another day of how THAT came about! You guys shoulda bribed Swapna she knew the answer LOL.....So having said that and seeing only three people tried and or got the answer....everybody gets something....cuz Im unselfish and giving and Im a wanna be martyr with a hairy chin and lopsided breasticles who craves lime jello.....HAHA!

eBay is Satan

So like I don't have even yarnage, pattern booklets, and other crap....eBay taunts me, "Come see what's newly listed, ya know ya wanna" and " Look this seller takes money order and s&h is like almost nothing".....Has anyone else heard these same voices?

Anyhow I have been a loon scouring the pages of eBays yarniness and patternness....and I have fallen into the buy-it-before-it's-gone-and-you'll-never-see-it-again gap.....I now share with you the fruit of my eBay lust....

Booklets
Leek Chenille
Pesto Chenille
Mahogany Chenille
Navy Chenille
Redwood Chenille
More Booklets
Yarn Lot

That is my written confession thus far! The first booklets listed I had to have due to that rocking doily pattern! The chenille will soon have siblings here as I am buying a ton for several projects that will take a ton of yarnage-yardage. So those are for projects already in mind, they have a purpose. The second set of booklets I HAD to have, indeed I had to fight a fellow bidder to get them, all because of that crazy blue baby dress....I don't even KNOW any tiny humans! UGH! And lastly and possibly the most sad...I had to get that mixed lot of yarn only because I wanted to feel the deep olive green on top of the pile. I won't be able to stay away from eBay until I have all the chenille I need for my few projects....but hopefully I can keep it down to 20 bucks a week.....thats my self imposed allowance! BTW that lot of chenille I got for $20.74 total!

Okay my fave feel good movie as of yesterday is Beauty Shop! HOLY HELL, isn't Queen Latifah sexah! I can't wait to watch it again.

I have pics of made things to show you all later. Yep I actually craft and crochet etc! I just dont post every item I make only a few....Sorta felt as if I'm asking for validation or praise.....Odd, I know, but hey, I over think everything! Roll wit it! People will think I never actually crochet LOL.....

I sent my falling yarn package out....it was 25 bucks to ship it! I gotta remember to say USA only next round of swaps....I keep getting overseas folks...not that I mind but I need a postal break for a bit, lol! $25.00 is alot of eBay! hehe I hope Mimicat likes her booty!

Also I sent my secret pal's package out....I won't be doing sp's anymore. I just am not entertaining enough I guess....I do want to say SPs is a two way street, it takes two to make it work. If I sent an e-mail or cards with questions and never got a reply but saw that they were opened.....why bother going to the forum and making a point of saying you feel neglected by me? Live and learn I guess...no more sps for me....On the other hand I was treated royaly by my secret to me pal...which totally rocks!

I am currently working on Yule boxes.....I think I will need a hand transplant LOL!

Lynlee eat something! DAMN IT! Don't make me come feed you....(insert evil bat pounding the hand smiley)

WOW....

I stole this from Kimberly, whos blog I'm unable to post at! BOO-HOO! I think she may think I abandoned her! I didn't I promise. Also I can't post at Dawn's or Reigina's blogs..the pages will not load for posting! I can read them however.

Oh yea back to what I stole from Kimberly......

You Are Likely an Only Child

At your darkest moments, you feel frustrated. At work and school, you do best when you're organizing. When you love someone, you tend to worry about them. In friendship, you are emotional and sympathetic. Your ideal careers are: radio announcer, finance, teaching, ministry, and management. You will leave your mark on the world with organizational leadership, maybe as the author of self-help books.

The Birth Order Predictor

Oddly, I am technically the second of nine I was somewhat raised an only child, but its sorta accurrate.

Touchy-Feely!

My horoscope this morning:
On a day like this one, you can practically sit back and just let fun and romance come to you. But you'll enjoy yourself even more if you make an effort to get out there and be seen. The more people you see, the more likely one of them can bring a little love and spice to your life. You just get along so well with everyone around you, each new person you meet will feel like a new best friend or your next true love.

Cool!!! Guess I better get to loving people, do I charge and whats the going rates? And do I have to report it to IRS?....Hey does that "The more people you see" part mean ALIVE people or crossed over ones too? Okay nice horoscope...me likes this one.

Let's Have Some FUN!

Okay so here is the deal! Im on a mental upswing! Things are feeling purdy damn good right now, so I feel like having some fun and giving something away!

This is what we are gonna do, I am making up a box of lovely things, this and that type items! And whoever wins this fun contest thingy gets it! If there is more than one correct answer then I will draw a name from my cauldron. LOL!
Remember back in all my lame ramblings and recall that I went to college to get a degree in science. I was going to study genetics. I also was a few classes away from carrying a degree in science and education as well as english. I planned it that way so that my last year would tie up the loose ends and I'd have multiple degrees.
Well life happens and that didn't...so tell me what did I do as a career finally?
By trade what am I? Very few people know online. If you know then you're excluded! If I know you well enough that you already know, I send you crap anyway, LOL! Also if you know dont blurt it out...give the "unknowings" a chance! Mucho grassy-ass!

Recap: Tell me what I did after all that college for a living and career....come on you can do it!

Running time, from today October 9th until Sunday October 16th.

Pics!!!!

Here are all the fabulous pics! Okay scratch that, not fabuous PICS but pics of fabulous gift-age! And some purchases.

First is a pic of the yarn from Rodney over at eBay!The whole lot including shipping was a bit over 20 bucks...And its rayon not cotton, I misspoke in my previous post.



Next is a pic of the wonderful amulet bag Priscilla sent along with some really cool beads. She crocheted this amulet bag and gifted it to me when I inquired about them...How generous is that? Priscilla is a crocheter and she sews as well. You should see some of her other work! Fabulous!



I bought this cotton yarn from Toni over at Stitchingirl....she has some more I NEED, but I am trying to contain myself!Here is her "yard sale" link.



Up next is a pic of the CAT package I won over at Crochetlist, get this. just for visiting with fellow crocheters! How about them apples? Cool, huh?



Now I am gonna play "follow the link". I posted some pics over at C'ville of all the wonderful gifts Lynlee sent. Please, go check it out so you can ooooooo and ahhhhhhhh! LINK

On a more serious note, not sure where Swapna is in relation to the quake..but please keep her and her family in your thoughts and prayers...Hope all is well my friend and will be thinking of you!

Blessings Abound

Well we are back! I have a novel to share!

Our overnighter turned into 5 nights! OY! Let's just say, I know my way around one of Houston's landmarks VERY VERY well! All went well, I think, and we haven't to return to H town until the 19th! Yippie! So thanx to those who prayed, vibed, meditated and sent warm fuzzies! It helped mucho! Blessing number one, by far the biggest!

I have loads of pics to share....
I will post them tomorrow or later today, rather. I got home and had packages out the hoooha! Me loves me some packages!

First, my friends Priscilla, sent me these fabulous beads and a GORGEOUS amulet bag!
Second, I got my box of yarny goodness from Rodney! HELLO! Can we say get busy mama?
The brown boucle I ordered is exactly what I was looking for. Its a very light cotton boucle probably appr. the size of #3 thread! The chenille is a sw, fabu! He even included two samples balls!(Yikes that reads weird, gutterminds)
Next I received a package of cotton elite by Lily in a granny smith apple green from Toni over at Stitch'n girl! (will post link later) She is destashing and has/d wonderous deals on higher end yarn! I got my booty for $7.00, 4 skeins of it, yeah baby!
Then, I got my CAT package from Patricia over at Crochetlist! OMG She sent a box from Herrschnerrs. In it was, 9, 3 oz skeins of caron simply soft in navy, 2, 6 oz skeins of caron simply soft in kelly green and a size H hook, and a free stole pattern to boot! All this gifted to me for chatting with fellow crocheters one night!
And lastly, but not least! Lynlee who was my secret pal, sent me the most kind and "listening" gift ever! What I mean by listening is she took what I say to heart and gave things that mean something to me! Weeping all friggin day! I feel like Im in a kleenex commerical or hallmark or some such rot! Hurry someone share their International House cup of coffee with me! Is that the name of the stuff that comes in the little tins with flavors like swiss chocolate?
Anyway she had a box full of great things! A fabulous purse with lining! Perfect colors for ME!!!! A pendant! Candles and a Goddess soap! Lana yarn for felting, lustersheen in a super cool verigated!Trendsetters eyelash-y type yarn in a yummy brown! A yarn cutter pendant! She also sent my two offsprings a fab gifts a little diddy purse with a belt and pendant, one for each! And a super warm notecard! But the best was a hardback copy of Pippi Longstockings! Think back folks.....remember when I was waxing poetic about PL and what having that book meant to me as a child and saying I lost it over the years somewhere? Well PL is with me again thanx to Lynlee! Come on talk about great SP! Oh crap, I know I am forgetting something! She had the box so full of goodly stuff!Oh well I will post the pics in the morrow and all will see the generous-ness of Miss Lynlee! Can you imagine the brain power it took for her to be my SP? She had to be Lynlee and then SP and the moderator....all the while faking me out! Okay so Im a dim bulb but still! LOL Thank you Lynlee you are da bomb! Hey how often do you get a 30 something calling you "da bomb" LOL....I will stop crying now I promise! All kinds of blessings above!Who knew they came in a box?

Okay I miss Swapna and Kimberly, whos has them? Return them please, no questions asked! You may leave them at the front desk or drop them in the over night slot! Please do not rewind!